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humor:
George Bernard Shaw
The government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
Notes: From ?®Everybody??s Political What??s What??∆

Hugh Kenner
Definition of an 'Irish fact':
That which tells you not what is the case but what you want to hear.

Spike Milligan
My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.

Oscar Wilde
Samuel Johnson once said "the Irish are a fair people, they never speak well of one another." So, naturally, Brendan Behan, that bad boy of Irish literature, had the Irish insult down to a fine art:
Notes: "If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks."

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Marriage is the same.

Unknown Author
Ireland remains a deeply religious country, with the two main denominations being "us" and "them". In the unlikely event you are asked which group you belong to, the correct answer is:"I'm an atheist, thank God".

that he only opened his mouth to change his feet. On one occasion he told his audience that "the cup of Ireland's misery has been overflowing for centuries and is not yet half full." Joining that remarkable cup is this spectacularly mixed metaphor, also by Roche: "All along the untrodden paths of the future, I can see the footprints of an unseen hand."
Notes: It has been said of Sir Boyle Roche, MP (1743-1807) for Tralee, Co. Kerry)

Out for lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also.
Notes: Sign on a Kinsale shop

Unknown Author
They invented the three-day bank holiday weekend because you can't lump all the bad weather into just Saturday and Sunday.

"TRESPASSERS PROSECUTED - PLEASE SHUT THE GATE"
Notes: Notice in a Co. Down field ....

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